Armoured man crushed to discover The Dragon is a store

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1981

By: Edward Willems

GUELPH – Local student Jordan Hoult marched through downtown Guelph last Thursday on a quest of fierce bravery and fortitude, only to discover that The Dragon he had heard so much about was, in fact, a comic book store.

First year student Hoult had not been in Guelph for long when he first heard talk of his friends’ experiences with The Dragon. He heard tales of people venturing forth with their own Magic to battle, and bizarre trinkets and treasure troves within. Hoult declared that this would be his destiny.

Proudly donning his iron breastplate and greaves – forged by fellow student and blacksmith-hobbyist, Andrew Northey – Hoult set out at dawn to face what he presumed was a massive fire-breathing foe sequestered within the quiet halls of the Old Quebec Street Mall. Onlookers were intrigued by this valiant knight and watched him stride through the mall, come face to face with the store’s entrance, and stare at it questioningly.

Hoult left the mall without even glancing at the shelf of newly released comics, and disjointedly set out on another quest to meet up with fellow knights at the RoundTable.

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