By: Nolan Wadsworth
GUELPH & EVERYWHERE – A copy and paste white guy from the Hamptons or wherever took to Overheard at Guelph the other day to post an elongated rant/manifesto to the popular forum for all things Guelph about how this generation is soft and how generations before us did things right.
The post read, “Back in the day [Editor’s note, the man’s Facebook profile suggests that he is 22 and his Guy Fawkes mask in his pictures suggest he is an expert on fragile masculinity], men were men and they fought the Nazis”.
Promptly the comment section was filled with passionate Guelph students explaining to him the countless ways he was wrong about human needs and he may have a romanticized view of serious trauma people went through, to which he responded with an all caps statement of “IT’S FREE SPEECH” in what can only be assumed to be a feverous huff and puff.
Cory, the hero Guelph doesn’t need but the hero it deserves took to the post to call the man an “a**hat” and everyone in our new office, the third stall of the Mountain Hall men’s bathroom gave out a hearty chuckle.
Students were also quick to point out that the Free Speech Rally held on campus by the Mayonnaise enthusiasts club under dominion and protection from the Nu-CSA was to be met with hostilities, as prominent Mayonnaise purists declared their attendance. Other copy paste white guys mumbled something about respecting a healthy dialogue, while fantasizing about a world where Mayonnaise wouldn’t be so spicy.