By: Jarin Pintana

This week Guelph has seen a major recall on all orange juice with pulp. It’s been pulled from shelves city-wide in just two days time. “I don’t know why we’ve allowed it to be sold for this long,” Guelph grocery store owner Hallett Babbage admitted. “The stuff just sucks”.

After residents have long been subjected to the horrors of orange juice with pulp, the city has finally taken long anticipated actions against it. The days of accidentally buying pulped orange juice and only realizing it when you take your first ghastly sip at home, are over.

There is some speculation that this may create a spike in the underground orange juice market but so far the police say it is of little concern. Officer Joe Ecilop was able to comment on the matter. “You’re always going have your fare share of granola hippies, juice fetishists and general freaks trying to get their pulp fix. But we’ve already assigned a detail who will be monitoring the blackmarket juice trade”.

The general consensus from the police force was that it is important to concentrate on the issue at hand with a fresh perspective to squeeze out any illegal juice related activity.



Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here