By: Jack Fisher

GUELPH – With December right around the corner, most people’s minds are starting to turn towards the holidays as they picture dancing confectionaries and roasting chestnuts on a safe enclosed fire. However, this reality is a distant future for many students.

Before the holidays, students in university and college will be forced to succeed in a series of brain-twisting challenges before they are released into the waiting arms of their families and relatives for a brief parole. Exam season is upon us and, like, of course we’re ready. Yeah.

In an interview, current University of Guelph student Becca Clarke said “yeah, totally.” When asked if she was ready for exam season. “As long as I finish the readings I should be good. Uh huh”

“I did the math, and all I need is a 37.4% on this soc final to pass my class”

“I’ve only got six exams anyway.” Clarke added, “Two are on the same day and one is, uhh… two days from now” intimating that this year’s exam period may last for nearly five weeks, just a few days less than the recent college strike.

College students in the area are even more ready according to one source. While rolling his eyes, Josh Pinto, a Conestoga College student said “oh yeah. I’m ready.” Adding that “we had five weeks to prepare to do seven weeks of school in two weeks. Honestly this is peak readiness.”

With the tension in the air rising like well mixed cupcake batter, the stakes are exactly the same as always.

“I did the math, and all I need is a 37.4% on this soc final to pass my class” said Clarke. “I’ve totally got this. Of course.”


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