By: Edward Willems

GUELPH– Many students participating in their weekly Social Deviance lecture were surprised and excited when their professor, Dr. Parnaby, announced that he had run out of things to teach today and was going to end class half an hour early. While many were relieved at being able to catch an earlier bus home, a number of students were alerted to the fact that an unknown colleague had merely entered the class five minutes prior.

The student in question had arrived to class nearly an hour late, and the classmates she chose to sit beside later remarked that she arrived in a cloud of ash and smoke. Presumably arriving from an extended puff on a wacky tobacky lung-cancer-causing stick of death, the student ambled into class nonchalantly and paced for a minute looking for a perfect seat to place her tar-ridden carcass. Finally settling on the first seat she had originally looked at, she proceeded to check her phone for texts from similarly coughing addicts and vagabonds. After perusing to her soon-to-be-sickly heart’s content, she sluggishly reached into her bag to prepare her laptop for note taking, just as Dr Parnaby finished his conclusory statement and wished everyone a good night.

Despite her original dawdling entrance, many students remarked that the unknown smoker quickly packed up her things and was among the first to leave the room.


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