Spider excited to be reunited with long lost friend


“There is my friend” says the spider on the wall above Ricardo Thompson.

Spider has fond memories of Ricardo from its first year of life. Spider moved to a new home two years ago from the bathroom cupboard where it was born into the wall between the kitchen and backyard.

Spider has had a good life since then with easy access to outside, it’s been eating like a king.

Yesterday, Spider decided to go say hello to its old friend.

For hours, Spider was waiting in its old home. Spider says it had to chase out a centipede and a pillbug to reclaim its spot. But it’s a bigger spider now and that was no issue.

“We used to see each other almost everyday” recalls Spider. “almost always at the same time.”

“Humans are dirty creatures you know, they always have that smell about them.” Spider continues, “but sometimes, when the smell doesn’t go away when they leave, flies come. That’s the best.” As it says this, six of Spider’s eyes close in memory (the other two continuing to watch for prey, its mandibles drooling from the memory of juicy flies.

“Oh, there’s my friend” Spider says as Ricardo sits down on the toilet, phone in hand.

“He’s a bit distracted I guess.” Spider whispers. “I’ll go surprise him.”


Spider’s funeral will be held tomorrow under the pool-deck in the backyard. Donations of spider thread are welcome.


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