In a new trend, vehicles that make sound at night are to use signal flags instead of horns.

Guelph Paramedic and Fire Service staff are required to complete flag-training before the end of July.

“It worked so well with the trains,” says a city councilor. “After we figured out how to get through to CN about their horrible treatment of citizens, we figured ‘why stop there?’”

There will be a new sound bylaw strictly enforced in the city. Any person who wakes another up during the night will be fined.

New parents need not worry. The law only applies to those above eight years of age.

The first person to be fined was actually the Police Chief’s nephew. Nine year old Peter was banging around at 4:30am.

“The kid sounded like a damn freight train!” said the Chief. “he was making enough noise to wake the dead!”

Little Peter is on the hook for a $1,500 bill which the court has ordered his parents not pay for.

Some Guelph citizens have now turned their sights on Ontario’s Amber Alert system. With the slogan “Save Our Sleep”


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